Nationality :
Three women - a German, a Jew and a polack - all gave birth to seven pound baby boys at the same time. The nurses got the babies mixed up somehow and couldn't tell which baby belonged to which mother.
After an hour of mass confusion the father of the German baby decided he would settle the problem. He walked into the nursery and lined up the three infants in a row. He then clicked his heels, raised his arm in a salute and shouted, "Heil Hitler!"
The German baby snapped to attention, the Jewish baby shit it's pants and the polish baby played in it!
Suicide:
Why did Hitler kill himself?
The Jews sent him a gas bill!
Jews
Why is the rhinoceros jealous of Jews?
Jews have bigger noses.
Difference:
What's the difference between jews and boyscouts?
Boyscouts come back from their camps!
Planet
What's Hitlers least favorite planet?
'Jewpiter
100jews
How do you get 100 jews into a car?
Throw a quarter in it.
How do you get them out again?
Tell them Hilter is driving.
How many ??
How many jews can you fit in a VW Beetle?
54, two in the front, two in the back, and fifty in the ashtray !
A parrot ^^
Abe wants to buy a parrot and goes to his local pet shop to see what they have. The assistant shows him a parrot and says, "This one is very special - it speaks English and Yiddish perfectly."
Abe is a little incredulous, so he asks the parrot: "Is it true you can speak Yiddish?"
The parrot shrugs and says, "With a nose like this, what do you think?"
Taxi:
A taxi driver is taking a Jew down a hill. Suddenly the driver screams, "The brakes are gone!" The Jew screams, "Stop the meter!"
Jewish shop:
Abe walks into the local tavern and sees his friend Moishe sitting at the bar. He puts his hand to his heart and says: "Oy vey, Moishe! I'm so sorry to hear about your shop burning down."
Moishe shakes his head and whispers, "Shhh, not so loud. That's next week."
Erection:
Q: What happens when a Jew with an erection walks into a wall?
A: He breaks his nose.
SANTA JEW
Did you hear about the Jewish Santa Claus? He comes down the chimney, wakes the children and says, "Hey kids, do you want to buy some toys?"
Big noze ???
Q: Why do jews have big nozes ?
A: Because air is free xD
Porn movies:
Q: Why do Jews like to watch porn movies in reverse?
A: They like the part where the hooker gives the money back.
MONEY!
Q: Why are synagogues circular?
A: So the jews can't hide in the corner when the collection plate goes around.
